The dowry essentially stands as a token of safety, regard, and honor for the wife. The way we’ll probably do it is I’ll pay the bulk (70/80% of deposit) but give my wife a 50% stake in the property (or hold it as joint-tenants). assistance for her from the state belongs exclusively to her and it is not He believes a husband and wife should go halves in everything believe it or not with whatever little money I get I still try to go halves but there are times he is harsh and makes comments about how a wife should help her husband financially. My husband and I both are students 26 yrs old, i come from a lower middle class family and he comes from an upper class family. I have this close friend whose husband recently got married to a 2nd lady; her co-wife has a child from a previous relationship, my friend has 2 children from her husband, she gets benefits from the government and she spends it on her living costs. The way I see it, marriage will make me ultra poor. send it via a family member of his. I feel bad asking for money from him (self respect etc as he doesnt work and i often feel like its unfair and uncessary for his mother to pay for my expenses) but i do struggle financially often. 126316. I have been married for the past 2 years alhamdullilah. Depends on the wording of the nikah contract. marriage) with a good heart, but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit The rest if for her two children. The wife in particular deserves a standard of living at least equal to that which she was used to prior to marriage (unless the husband has flagged to the wife before marriage that times could get hard!). Another thing which I would like some clarification on is that if the wife passes away, how is her will executed according to Shria? Weddings should be paid for by the groom or, if it has to be someone from the girl’s side, then the father. yourselves unjustly except it be a trade amongst you, by mutual consent”, “And give to the women (whom you marry) their Mahr a pursuit through which she gets remunerated) she should pay for it. In this case, now that I do not have a job and my parents are sick and do not earn, is it an obligation on my husbands part to provide me with allowance/pocket money/take care of my basic expenses? Also my wife owns 2 houses which still have mortgage on it which I’m happy to pay for her (she is not currently working), but I’m obligated to do so? Islam is a communal religion and aims to create communities that look out for each other. permissible for him unless she gives it to him willingly. this is the same story that I have been hearing for twenty years … and I am really fed up with it now. From a purely technical perspective it makes sense for the ownership to link with the amount you contribute financially to that particular investment or property. As salaamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakaatu Ibrahim. Now her husband is demanding her benefits to be transferred on his name because he believes it is not Islamic for her to get money from the the government straight; she should be getting it through him,but he is not asking for his 2nd wife's benefits to be transferred to his name; as an excuse he is saying that she was getting those benefits from before she got into the marriage, so on these grounds he can't ask her. When the wife agrees to buy her freedom, it is called khula in Arabic, which means something belonging to the wife is taken away from her. What should the right thing to do? And when he covers her, she carries a light burden and continues therein. Marrying this man is a bitter regret. He said it be our money and we have joint account when that happens. It is the right of a wife. If you want to marry him then why does his fanancial obligations become a barrier? Should I do this with my husband’s permission? I want to help him and I wanted to ask if I’m willingly giving money to my husband is it wrong? With the transient nature of employment today, the situation of a house-husband and a working wife is not that uncommon. Hello can I have some advise please, signing a Nikah contact does it give a man or woman financial gain to assets if the marriage doesn’t work out.? If not employment then they may feel obligated go share any savings which they accumulated pre marriage. I his career. I dont have a job but im helping my parents selling stuff. There are two ways this analysis can run. The Quran states that wives should be "obedient and submissive to their husbands," and a saying of the Prophet Muhammad says that "If a husband says to his wife to transform a yellow mountain into a black one or turn a black mountain into a white one, she should obey his orders. On the other hand I’m in my 2nd year at University and I am working part time. ‘Aa’ishah said: “Hind bint ‘Utbah, the wife of Abu Sufyaan, entered upon the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, Abu Sufyaan is a stingy man who does not spend enough on me and my children, except for what I take from his wealth without his knowledge. when she died would go to the husband and no one else would have a share in Or if x pays 70% of the deposit, but then only contributes 50% of the ongoing mortgage payment, you can tot up the eventual total each person will have paid and split the house accordingly. 5 Facts about Maimoona (RA) Wife of Prophet Muhammad PBUH. few times my brother and dad helped us but now im sick and tired of always covering up for his financial responsibilities. The husband gets a half if his wife did not leave a child or grandchildren from her son. I am not talking only with regards to social expectations rather based on social responsibility. The Prophet’s weddings are our example – and they were very simple. First I will outline what the financial responsibilities are between husband and wife and then get into the modern practicalities e.g. If she has some savings or gold, should she not first think of liquefying that to be used? It is primordial that women clarify their roles with potential husbands and have some clear marital regulations stipulated in the Nikkah contract.It is also essential that our Imams address those issues in Kutbahs as a lot of sisters are encountering the same treatment at the hands of their husbands. Thank you for the helpful article. For example, the wife died and left a son, a daughter and a husband, then her husband gets a quarter of inheritance. On Interest "Allah will deprive usury of all blessing, but will give increase for deeds of charity" (Quran 2: 276). We’ve been married for 8 years and it’s just been like this I thought maybe cause we married young he wasn’t sure about responsibility but it’s still continuing and I’m very unhappy about it. Why is that? im really mad and hurt and contemplating separation. Narrated Jabir ibn Abdullah: Allah's Messenger cursed the accepter of interest and its payer, and one who records it, and the two witnesses; and he said: They are all equal (Muslim). It has certainly uplifted my knowledge which I’d love to share. What I think Islam is great at, is giving a general framework that works for most people, but also leaving enough flexibility for the outliers. Husband-wife relationship is a great relationship. If the wife stipulated, at the time of marriage, that her husband allow her to work, then he must allow her to carry on with her work, unless the nature of her work changes and it becomes unlawful, such as if she is working with non-mahram men, or the nature of the work is unlawful, such as working in riba-based banks or insurance companies, and the like. The nature of work has obviously changed. Even if there are such differences statistically across men versus women, it is a mistake to impute such differences to any individual as those scholars have done. Please advise. The leader of people is a guardian and is responsible for his subjects. Ever since i closed my business and started working for small firm which did pay enough to cover my kids fees all the time. husband will pay for education, wife will be allowed to work, the husband is only allowed to marry one wife, the wife has the right to divorce if xyz happens etc). This is not your responsibility. Assalamualikum Brother, There is no legal obligation – but in the interest of transparency its probably good. If the husband is a humble shopkeeper while the wife is a doctor, the husband still has the technical responsibility to support the household on his own. Basically, I just don’t feel provided for? Basically, it is the husband’s responsibility to provide for a house and so him owning outright is fine. Its all well and good outlining the responsibility of the husband and the wife but in our 21st century world family patterns have evolved. Also as there is the corona virus going on he therefore needs to be at home with his family and he isn’t getting paid from his workplace or his parents are not giving him any money whilst on the other hand I am getting paid for staying at home from my workplace. Your wife and children deserve a reasonable standard of living, given your financial position. Probably worth a delicate chat. What is the Islamic law about this. I ask about it before but he refuse because he have a lot of bills to pay and saving for paying the visa so i can move to him. every time I remember this 3 time slap my hearts break so badly I’m love him this my weakness and forgive him. He don’t give me monthly allowance. I find out afterwards. 70% of deposit)? If dowry money (Haq Mehar) has not been paid to the wife, it will also be considered a debt. Do you have any suggestions? Please can I ask what your thoughts are on the purchase of e.g. It is not permissible for the husband to take anything from Allah has made it lawful).”. The key building block to creating that outcome is the family, and one of the most important lubricating factors that creates and grows a happy, prosperous family is money and finances. Aslm I am a working wife my husband however told me he wont work and ask me why must he work we have no children I want to know is this permissible in Islam that a wife must provide for her husband. I’m in need of clarity in all sincerity from my side with no hidden intention on my end that if ever in the event of a talaaq been decided (a very last resort as hoping in sha Allah all will work out as we try to resolve our issues), I merely want to know what all my wife can claim from me as many a times, she threatens to take me to court to claim compensation for emotional & health decline saying it’s intentional abuse. He should respect the right Shariah has granted to her star stable downloaden mac. The Qur’an says: “But the father of the child shall bear the cost of the mother’s food and clothing on a reasonable basis” [al-Baqarah 2:233], “Let the rich man spend according to his means; and the man whose resources are restricted, let him spend according to what Allaah has given him” [al-Talaaq 65:7]. Who pays for the wife’s commuting costs to her job? I am Sunni. Caught him alot of times. Women are said to have the advantage with respect to these attributes – but as said earlier I do not like to generalize about gender differences. Please advise me. Fourth, the wife's money is her personal property and the husband has no right to take it. He should respect the right Shariah has granted to her star stable downloaden mac. Just be patient in teaching the children. I would like to know, is a wife obligated (by law, customs or otherwise) to give money to her husband and/or share their finances? Thank you so much. Lord Masuka the great spell caster brought my husband back to me after a hectic separation, whatsapp him for any help +1(234)-307-0752. I recommend a fixed monthly transfer to one’s wife (“pocket money” if you want to call it that) as that enables her to have some freedom in being able to spend without having to always ask the husband. Who is responsible for the financial responsibility of the child when the parents are divorced? Arguments for the former are that were the wife not to work she would look after the child (and as the hadith on shepherds suggests above, looking after children is primarily the responsibility of the wife). I am currently successful in my job and my husband has grown to be very successful The husband-wife relationship is one of love and mercy, and from that love originates a miracle of life. The basic principle concerning any wealth the wife owns is that it belongs to her and not to her husband, whether this wealth came into her possession by means of trade or business, or through inheritance, or as part of her mahr (dowry) or from the state. Please can you give one advice about maintaining wife children+husband mother and father. Your husband is technically obliged to meet your needs (not your parents). We are poor and my father have to support me when he shouldn’t and we are 10 in the family that had to be feed. house, care, land etc? My wife says from time to time ..” i have a right on your money ” and means that i should give her a ” salary . I dont know what to do.. Just going through bad patch for many years.. Everyone talks about woman right but here i am financially struggling with wife in full control and always taunting for my low income status.. And when he covers her, she carries a light burden and continues therein. RELATED STORIES. If the husband is a humble shopkeeper while the wife is a doctor, the husband still has the technical responsibility to support the household on his own. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Yes, that’s right – nothing. Hope that helps iA. Also whenever I plan on visiting my husband my parents start arguing with me they say I shouldn’t waste my money that I earn on going and visiting him when’s it’s my earnings as i would need to pay for my ticket and when I’m in Pakistan with him he pays the rent and for our food. thatll take us 4-6 years to pay back. Is this right in islam? Thanks for your most enlightening article. Now the issue is I have at least 2 years to call my husband here in the U.K. or either if I decide to go live in Pakistan and work at British high commission. Then things started going bad for me from financial aspect as i started my own work because by then my wife was already earning 5 times more than i did. Am I being reasonable here? I think it’s great you have shed light on this topic as many people shy away from discussing financial responsibilities as if it’s shameful to talk about. Assalamu Alaikum. Salaam alaikum, Practically the best way to clarify all this is going through the process of writing a will. The shepherd hadith specifies guarding the husband’s property and children – and so long as that is achieved the wife has fulfilled her bare responsibility. It missed the point somewhat to treat finances in a relationship at such a basic level. She did give me almost the same about i gave her but at the same time my business did go as well i hoped for and I struggled.. Talk it through – but the above article are really a summary of our thoughts. This is called “Wasiyyat” in the Holy Quran. So we agreed. Doesn’t sound like a responsible guy from your description. We fly all 3 several times to holiday as well i support her parents( to be clear with more as 3 salary of local high school teacher /year ) if her family beed money we borrow some and give ss well some . I don’t say anything but my husband has spare money which was there to save for our home but she needed a large some of money as she lost all of her savings somehow and needed a deposit for a home. Just a random shop here and there. He spends money on himself and saves the rest and when I ask him for money or to buy something we need he says he doesn’t have money but then he goes and buys expensive electronics or clothes/shoes. Now, when the trend of watching pornography is increasing so the young generation misleads the concept of Halal and Haram. Who pays for childcare when the wife goes to work? A wife has a right to her husband’s money when they are effectively separated Q&A: Dominic Coyle Sun, Jun 2, 2019, 17:00. I feel like there’s always an expectation for a Woman to be lenient towards a man when it comes to his responsibilities which in turn in reality makes it easier for Men to cop out of their responsibility all together. Hi I do believe there should be give and take in a marriage but I don’t think a Woman should be guilt-tripped into giving nor should she feel Indirectly ashamed to ask for her rights or expect “kindness” from her husband at the very least.
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